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Stiflingly heavy air with feet
2:40 AM
Stiflingly heavy air with feet

Its freaking 2.40am and I should be in bed with the aircon full blast because its so damn stiflingly warm and I have to go to work in less than 10 hours but I just can't. And yup, I'm blogging on my new laptop. Its nice to finally have my own laptop, smaller screen and keyboard than what I'm used to, my hands feel a lil cramped, but the images look sharp and loads of stuff to play around with. Its just that I'm still a wee bit annoyed that I didn't manage to pick out my own laptop personally and the casing is plain black (yes I'm being childishly bimbotic here but I was hoping for a light pink or blue or even silver casing) and there's so much techie stuff to deal with which I'm damn lousy at. Okay I'm being whiny and bengang tonight so I'll sing its praises another day along with my new phone (yup, I got this one in white and pink and its such a girl phone). For tonight, I'll just add it to that list of not-yet-blogged things which is growing longer by the day.
And I'll add that blogging list on to the things-that-have-yet-to-be-done list, which is also getting longer by the day. No surprises there because I know that I have a serious time management issue. I know that I should write down a list of things that I have to do, but the thought of another damned list makes me wanna tear up the idea into tiny pieces and sweep it off the table into the dustbin. So it seems that I'm also being damn irrational tonight. But its getting harder to juggle all that in the air, dealing with whichever one is that has the nearest expiry date and topmost priority (which partially means whichever one my parents are lecturing about) and getting ready on my tippy-toes and hands outstretched to hopefully catch all the pieces when seams start bursting and it all starts falling apart. They say practice makes perfect, but this is not something I want to perfect right down to a tee. Oh the relief rush when everything comes right through the skin of your teeth by the seat of your pants style is like no other, but its nice to have everything properly written down and done in apple pie mode. I think I'll get a nice sheet of foolscap and a blue ink pen and start writing down everything that has to be done and see if I can pull it through perfectly without having to do a Royal London Circus juggler act again.
One thing good, castle is now viewable properly without having to scroll sideways on the laptop. My wrists are sore from pressing against the laptop and the emanating heat. I need to get used to it. And I'm damn whiny, grumpy and irrational tonight. What wouldn't I do to be able to speak a few choice words along with an icy cold shower right now. And my tummy's acting up again. Damn it, I want to bite into something solid. I want a slice of beef pepperoni pizza right now!
And I've done it again. I'm not sure exactly how, but I think its connected to the lists. I really think I need to grow up out of these bouts of childish wilfullness. A part of me thinks and worries that I never will, and a part of me is reluctant to grow up so soon, knowing that with the growing pains will be the loss of a certain perspective and it won't be easy path to trudge. What an indecisive paradox I am. But I suppose I must, musn't I?
Must I really, now?

Written on Tuesday, August 07, 2007; 2:40 AM

Flip My Past:
  • Robyn oh Robyn
  • Girly talk laughter-filled lunch
  • Grandmothers who drive cool cars!
  • A deep red rose with silky petals
  • Moving in
  • A perfect golden afternoon
  • Cracking wise wisecracks
  • A bottle of Watson's water
  • chocolate chip cookies
  • Red and white

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