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Does the where and how matter so much?
7:26 PM
Does the where and how matter so much?

My conscience has been actively reminding me but I know that any slips I make along the way will be of my own doing and not because my conscience went away. You were there when I called for help. And now there's nothing more that you have not done.

How do you draw the line and stand up when you are not sure of what you believe in anymore?

Today, I don't know where I'm going at all.


Written on Friday, February 27, 2009; 7:26 PM
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Summertime
10:45 AM
Summertime

Woke up with lovely aches that you get after a good and scrummy bout of exercise. Made a tally of bruises and scrapes. I refused to get out of bed at 9am hence I bummed around under warm, colourful sheets for an hour. =) And did a lot of random things like blogging instead of eating breakfast and starting on my seminar work. And now that I have to leave my house in 10 minutes, my stomach decides to one-up me and start being hungry.

The parents in Vietnam over summer. This was some kind of museum. Don't you think they look like some old couple in a kampung sitting on the front steps bcz they have no work to do but to chill in the lazy afternoon heat? Hehe.

I wanted a pic with my mummy and my brother wanted to be the cameraman. After explicit instructions to take a picture of our upper-halves and not to chop up the Ho Chi Minh statue behind us, this is what he comes up with. On a secondary glance, look mummy we match colours perfectly. Purple and white!
A very pretty shop with reasonably price things. We wanted to get one of those vases/figurines but my dad figuring out that he would have to carry it for the whole day dissuaded us. =(
I think I look weird here but this is one of the few pics I took with my brother and I love him to bits so there!
And I leave you all with a lovely picture of good food from Sheraton Vietnam's international lunch buffet. The oysters in cheese were good and so were the sushi and sashimi and the pate thingy there. Okay I am running late as per usual so I shall rush off now.

Written on Monday, February 23, 2009; 10:45 AM
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Hot to go
2:40 AM
Hot to go

I had to hand in my module choice form for the 3rd year today. Major dilemma time with staying up late to call my parents so I can have their opinions on what I want to do for the rest of my life. And I realise that I've been talking way too little to them cuz I don't even know that my dad went outstation and I forgot that my mum is now in morning school. =.=

Went for a 2 hour netball session today which was pretty chilling compared to Wednesday. Got a little amused, than peeved than just slightly bored. And I started recalling lines that would be yelled at us during my high school netball sessions.

"You call that a centre pass ah?!"
When the centre pass doesn't get to the WA or GA and me being the GA will feel uber guilty because I suck at this whole dodging and bursting out real fast.

"What kind of ball is that???"
When its a bad pass either too forward or backward or it was just plain weak with buttery fingers. My passes are always damn weak and slow. =(

Oh and the ultimate dreaded one...

"Hundred! Hyperball! "
Upon aiming for the goal with a freaking tall defender literally blocking me.

And upon failing to shoot it in, it becomes
"Okay make sure you shoot in 100 goals for that shot you missed."

I miss those times so much. I miss the camaraderie I had with my team members cuz we played together for years in high school. And I remember the year we wore our bright orange short skirts with red shirts and this school laughed at us because we looked so bright and bimbotic and we totally kicked their asses in the game. And how we would always cheer for other schools and they would cheer back for us against schools that were overly aggressive.

Warwick games is gonna be a challenge because I've only played 2 hours of netball this year. And its played on an outdoor court with weather that'll probably feel like 4-5 degrees celcius with a 20km/h wind speed. Oh and I have a huge bruise + scrape on my knee and matching ones on my elbows cuz I tripped and fell 10mins into the game. Major malufying moment. >.<

La-di-da and all aside, I watched Australia on Tuesday and I thought it was really good. Kinda epic and comedy and romantic with Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman (who is so hot!). And it made me wanna revisit Australia sometime in the near future.

I think that I'm going in blind and I'm apprehensive. I don't know where the line is. And I'm not sure if I want to find the line eventhough I think I should before I falter. It always ends up like this, a nerve-ticking and indecisive process which may turn out to be pretty bad.

I realised that knowing things about people doesn't mean that you really know them.

Written on Saturday, February 21, 2009; 2:40 AM
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Venetian or Swarovski
1:08 AM
Venetian or Swarovski

Just when you have everything compartmentalised nicely, something will come tripping along and those glass boxes that neatly store all the little nick-nacks of life and keep those dangerous boundaries separate will melt and runaway down the lane into this huge, unchecked yet possibly beautiful puddle that children will dream of splashing in after a rainy afternoon.

I'm waiting for the fall that I fear will be inevitable.


Written on Monday, February 16, 2009; 1:08 AM
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Grey shirts and silk dresses
2:45 AM
Grey shirts and silk dresses

Ask me again and I'll tell you the story that never was.
Dance with me again and I'll remember the innocence in us.
I'm glad we didn't go down that path or we wouldn't be what we are today.
And that is what I will always remember.


Another of the countless reasons for why I say a little prayer for you.

Written on Thursday, February 12, 2009; 2:45 AM
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PMS
5:12 PM
PMS

Malaysian Night is over and life seems strangely empty. Its the expected onslaught of the PMS. Post MalaysianNight Syndrome. =P While MNight did suck up a fair bit of my time, I'll admit I could have done more if I had better time management methods and a stronger will. But for now its like, Wow, I can finally eat a meal at home without having to run off for practices. Even my body knows the difference. Having existed on averagely 5 hours sleep a day for a week, I came back last night at 3am-ish and slept till 12 and had instant noodles for lunch and took another nap. And right now after a shower I want to crawl back into bed and sleep more. And my tummy is demanding tons of food to compensate for the past 2 weeks where I eat one proper meal a day out of a takeaway box or where I just don't eat the whole day and exist on emergency chocolate and biscuits after midnight.

I have traces of mascara and eyeliner, and my skin is so dry that it took me ages to slather moisturiser all over it. And uggh, I can feel the skin of my knuckles cracking up again. Oh and I discovered this huge cylindrical-shaped bruise on the back of my thigh like I got whacked with a rotan really badly and I have no idea where the heck it came from. I don't remember falling down or getting injured in practices (muscle aches don't count right?) and I wasn't trashed at the club last night to forget banging into something that painful to cause such a bruise. And I have fingernail marks on my hand that came from digging my own nails in when I had such a bad tummy cramp 2 days before Mnight and I couldn't stand up, whatmore practice dance. And 4 very red scratch dot-marks above my right knee that I didn't know were there till I was putting on tights. And a fading bruise on my left shin that I suspect came from dikir practice. Looks like I need way more work on this 'taking more care while doing activities' thingy since my daddy isn't here to take care of my injuries and I find it near impossible to rub my own bruises.

Okay before you all think that Mnight was all work and no play, I state out loud and clear that I had a lot of fun during practices even if I had to sacrifice sleep, eating and studying time for it. Note my listing of priorities. =P I don't have any pictures cuz I didn't bring my camera but I'm sure there will be some floating around somewhere so when I discover them I shall post it up. I'm slightly dreading the dikir barat video because I knew I made mistakes and some were pretty obvious ones which should not have been made. Sigh. And I know my lovely housemates can't wait to show me the videos they took of me doing the Indian and Chinese dance.

I feel like sleeping/eating but I shall be good and start writing out a to-do list now that Mnight is over and Reading Week is here.

Written on Sunday, February 08, 2009; 5:12 PM
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Let's take it from the top
3:00 PM
Let's take it from the top

You were right, I had my little getaway of fun and now its time to get back to real life. A summer fling with huge glasses filled with sunshiney goodness and umbrellas in them.

Full run rehearsal is in 50 minutes. I think I'll take a catnap and shower before heading back to the theatre. In 4 hours, its curtains up.

Let the show begin.

Written on Saturday, February 07, 2009; 3:00 PM
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A form of deja vu?
3:30 AM
A form of deja vu?

This is so ridiculous that its not even funny. It was fittingly wrong but now it seems to be wrongly fitting perhaps? Playing around with analogies doesn't change anything.

I'm hungry and I have cramps. I need proper food and a nice warm bed.

The one question that haunts me, how different would yesterdays' me be from today?

Written on Friday, February 06, 2009; 3:30 AM
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Intersecting lines
2:41 PM
Intersecting lines

This is me stealing 20 minutes in between church and dance practice to blog instead of starting on my international law seminar due tomorrow. Lately I’ve been pretty busy to the extent that I’ve not had dinner at home for almost 2 weeks. And that’s cuz I’ve been going for dance and dikir barat practices for Warwick Malaysian Night which is this Saturday. I have absolutely no idea how my classmates who are the committee members can balance their studies and activities cause I sure as hell can’t!

This shall be a random post because random things have been happening lately. Like today, it just sleeted for awhile during mass and we had curry for lunch cuz our priest decided to cook for us and now I’m nice and warm. And like how yesterday I came home at 6am and ate sushi for breakfast before going to bed. And like how I suddenly discover and remember why I don’t like doing certain things. And like how I suddenly discover that I have random unworn clothes at the back of my closet. And like how I bought 2 umbrellas in Birmingham. And how the one I kept still has the price tag still on it. And how I found someone just like a friend of mine but different. And how she looks just the way you do. And how I keep buying food that I know I will not eat and will end up throwing away.

Random? Or just subconscious awareness?

I don’t know. You tell me. =)

Written on Sunday, February 01, 2009; 2:41 PM
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